You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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