p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
