PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize