Umm I'm too high to move.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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