i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
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