I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
