This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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