Your mouth is God's brothel.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
