He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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