The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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