Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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