Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I want to have your abortion
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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