My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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