I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
so let's talk penis.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
