you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
