I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
The uberlube is also flammable
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize