If i come over, it means nothing
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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