i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
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