just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
