sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
