In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
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