I can't breathe out the right side of my face
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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