So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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