I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
