i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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