Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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