I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
