What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
