Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
