Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
