i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
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