so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
