You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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