I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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