are you still at the devil's house?
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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