The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
