i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
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