They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
