Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
