I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize
