I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I faked an abortion last night.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
