how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
