DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
