I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
