you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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