Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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