Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Randomize
