my room smells like sperm. sweet.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
