She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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