they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
I did not marry a roomba.
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