So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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